I try to sample various schools of thought and I attempt to understand how others think. Part of my assignment on a recent road trip was watching Real Time with Bill Maher on HBO. To say that Maher doesn’t like Christians is one of the great understatements of all time. He would have to double his respect for Christians to ratchet up to contempt. Whew…Maher is so cynical he makes me look like Mr.Rogers on Prozac. But he did have one segment that was kind of amusing. Maher does a segment that he calls “New Rules.” He outlines the old rule and then he comedically (at least in his mind) unveils the new rule. To be fair, some were funny.

I got to thinking about how that applies to us to as followers of Christ. We often look at the struggles of the journey and declare “new rules” for ourselves. Part of the spiritual battle is being deceived into believing that we are exceptions to the rule. Pride whispers that God is pretty lucky to have me on the team. Perhaps we imagine we are special like those selfish folks who drive down the shoulder of the highway instead of waiting in the traffic jam like everyone else. Or like the person who kept jamming their seat into my knees on a flight today and gave me an opportunity to field test my forgiveness blogs of recent days.

Rewriting the rules could result in the making if a special set of Dave rules that only I get to play by. For example, here is your rule followed by my rule.

When you gossip it is sin….
When I gossip it is “sharing.”

When you stand up for a belief you are stubborn and rigid…
When I do I have the strength of my convictions.

When you make a mistake you are an immature Christian…
When I screw-up I am going through a “difficult time”.

You are selfish…
When I act selfishly I am looking out for myself because no one else will.

When you miss church you are letting down the fellowship…
When I miss it is because of my difficult week that you can’t even begin to understand.

When you don’t work at a church function you are lazy…
When I don’t volunteer it is because I can’t possibly take on another thing (sighhhh)

When you take initiative you are self-centered…
When I take charge I am following God’s direction.

When you get angry you have a terrible attitude…
When I get ticked off I am “filled with righteous indignation”…or something. 

I think I have made the point. I can run my sin through the Dave filter, apply my special Dave rules and remove every shred of personal responsibility and accountability.  C.S. Lewis pointed out our nature when he said, “It is only our bad temper that we put down to being tired or worried or hungry; we put our good temper down to ourselves.”  The good things I do are me bein’ spiritual, the bad things I do are because of whatever excuse I can muster that day. I have had enough of the excuses in my own life. George Washington said that “It is better to offer no excuse than a bad one.” For Christians there should be no excuses…good or bad. On those “Bad Christian” days (and all of us have them) we just need to learn the following phrases.

I am sorry.

Forgive me.