I am not a crier. So it was a bit out of character when the tears started flowing yesterday as I drove through the canyon in downtown Dallas. I blame Lindsay for this event. Lindsay is my bride’s cousin who moved to Texas recently. She already loved country music so that saved us some time to indoctrinate her. We love having her in Big D but she is going to have to stop introducing me to songs that make driving dangerous.
Lindsay told us about a song that we just had to hear. So I downloaded it to the trusty iPod and fired it up as I drove to work yesterday. The song is called Tough and it is performed by Craig Morgan. If you know much about our past year you will quickly see why this song had the Old Yeller/Field of Dreams effect on the eyeballs. The lyrics start innocently enough…
She’s in the kitchen at the crack of dawn
Bacon’s on, coffee’s strong
Kids running wild, taking off their clothes
If she’s a nervous wreck, well it never shows
Takes one to football and one to dance
Hits the Y for aerobics class
Drops by the bank, stops at the store
Has on a smile when I walk through the door
The last to go to bed, she’ll be the first one up
And I thought I was tough
Chorus:
She’s strong, pushes on, can’t slow her down
She can take anything life dishes out
There was a time
Back before she was mine
When I thought I was tough
That made me smile as I remembered the days when Joni juggled three active boys through school, baseball, basketball, and forced Cotillion dance lessons. I was a little too absent as I carved out my career. I finally realized how tough she really was to raise three wonderful sons while her husband traveled around the country and world. I appreciated how tough she was while sacrificing weekends with our friends because sports teams insist on playing on the weekends and sports television was my job. So a mixture of fond memories and some regrets filled my mind when I got ambushed by the next verse.
We sat there five years ago
The doctors let us know the tests showed
She’d have to fight to live, I broke down and cried
She held me and said it’s gonna be alright
She wore that wig to church
Pink ribbon pinned there on her shirt
No room for fear, full of faith
Hands held high, singing Amazing Grace
Never once complained, refusing to give up
And I thought I was tough
I am not ashamed to admit that those words turned on the waterworks. That is my bride and that has been her journey. She has been full of faith from diagnosis day till this moment. No room for fear because she believes that faith in God casts out fear as you rest in His Sovereign hand. I have probably complained more about my knees aching than she has about cancer. And she has refused to give up because she wants to live and serve the Lord. If I thought I was tough that misguided notion fell by the wayside as I watched Joni battle cancer with the courage that a young shepherd boy challenged a Philistine giant. Now we have passed the one year mark, the scans have been clear and the treatments are nearly done.
How can I thank all of you who have prayed so faithfully over the past year? Many of you have prayed so diligently and I don’t even know you. We may never meet this side of eternity. Yet you have cared enough to pray for us throughout this long journey. Amazing. Joni has retired the wig now and is wearing her very own hair to church.
Joni’s strength and dignity have humbled me. There was a time before she was mine when I thought I was tough. No more. But there is one other thing I have learned during this difficult year.
I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength.
Yet it was good of you to share in my (our) troubles. Phil 4
Thank you. It really was good of you to share in our troubles. And we are so grateful and humbled.
Veronica
My mom went through cancer 5 years ago and now she has it again. My dad came home from Alabama one night and told us that he was crying because of this song on the way home. He told me what the name of it was, I looked it up, and I wrote a review for it. I have to admit that I cried too.
Deb Carpenter
This song was played at my Sister-In Laws funeral recently, She was 47, and had suffered from cancer for years, and was a very tough Lady. This is a tribute to Her
Kali Kyanne
This song is sooo beautiful!
Im using it for my myspace. This song just about brought tears to my eyes. I had just got done playing a volleyball game for my school. I made the A team. And we won.
This song is soo beautiful. I wish you and your family the best..
Love, Kali
Lora
I heard this song yesterday while tanning and I lost it. It is a beautiful song. I lost my mom to lung cancer 2 years ago. She was 60 years old. Then my husband was diagnoised with testicular cancer and and started his therapy on the 1year ann. of my mother’s death. He is doing GREAT!!! We then found out that my father-in-law, who lives with us, had lung cancer. We lost him a month ago. It has been a rough 3 years! This song is amazing. My momma was just that TOUGH!! Nine children! She was the toughest lady i know. She fought to the end! I Love you momma!!!!
Katie
Wow! I’ve heard this song multiple times, but after hearing it in the loading station for a ferry to get to Mackanac Island, Michigan, I started to realize what the second verse really said. I could sing along to the first verse, but I guess I never really payed attention to what the second verse said. After I caught a few words of it while walking around, I knew I wanted to find out what the rest of it said. LIke just about everyone, I googled the song, and I found this site. I have not had cancer, nor do/have I have/had a close relationship with anyone with anyone who has ever fought with cancer. Even so, I have heard so many stories about it, and I am amazed at the strength and faith that so many people have through everything. It is so good, as a 15 year old girl who goes to public school and hears about so many different things, to be refreshed by The Spririt and to have a chance to be uplifted by the faith and courage displayed by so many people. I, too, hope and pray that I can be a woman, like Jodi and so many others who have left comments and who I have observed personally, who will be faithful and be full of strength from The Spirit through whatever comes my way. I pray, too, that God will lead to a man and lifelong partner who will stand with me through whatever may come and be my support, as I will be his. All of you are such inspirations and I just pray that I can one day live up to what so many before me have done. Thank you all so much for everything you have said and done, it has been a blessing to not only me, but to so many others.
BETTY FAIRCHILD
GOD BLESS YOU, I HEARD THE SONG THIS MORNING, AFTER THE PHONE CALL, TELLING ME MY OVARIAN CANCER WAS BACK, IN STAGE THREE, I BROKE INTO A MILLION PIECES, SOME DAYS I THINK I AM TOUGH, OTHERS I GET TO FEELING A LITTLE WHIMPY. I TRY AND GIVE THANKS FOR THE GOOD AND THE BAD IN CANCER, AND KNOW I DO NOT WALK THIS JOURNEY ALONE, I ONLY PRAY I CAN BE AS STRONG AS THIS LADY, SHE’S AN ANGEL…..
Shirley Miller
this song is all about my best friend Vicki, who went to heaven on May 21st of this year. She went thru several chemo treatments and several radiation treatments. She was strong but she used to tell me I was the strong one. But after watching what she went thru, I don’t believe that I could put my body thru all that she went thru. She found out in February and in May she went to heaven. I miss and love her so much and my world is empty without her.
Ed
I’m another one who stumbled upon this website after googling the song title…My wife is a 2 year survivor of breast cancer…and I too was brought to tears by the ‘Danged Song’. To all the ‘Joni’s’ out there and the men who love them…my hats off to you. ‘Amazing Grace’! And thanks to Craig Morgan for putting these words to music!!
Ed
Mom and Dad are both gone now…Leaukemia took mom 21 years ago and Dad’s cancer just two years ago, about a year after Diagnosis. But like so many more that replied to your page…I heard this yesterday for the first time, in my car, It made me realize that my complaints were trivial. Mom WAS this song! With 5 children, myself the 2nd oldest, Mom and Dad didnt even mention it to me when they discovered she had leaukemia so I wouldnt change my plans for college. She fought without a complaint for nearly 4 years and when she finally got the rest she deserved and went to be with our Lord it was a tired heart, not the Cancer, that ended her fight. She recovered from a seizure and partial coma long enough to tell us all she was “going home tomorrow”, and that she did. Big advances have been made since 1986, thank God, and When I heard this song yesterday for the first time,
tania
Like some of the others, I heard the song on the car radio while driving and couldn’t stop crying. Last week, I came across an email that my husband had written to a hockey friend, and he said “I thought I was tough on the ice, but I’m nothing compared to Tania”. I was diagnosed in my third month of my first pregnancy. Complications made us lose the baby, as well as future fertility. Though I feel like crying a lot, so many people have told me how strong I am. I googled the song when I came home, and found this website. Thanks for all your stories.
Jim
This song broght me to tears also. I had always considered myself “tough enough”, but my wife has had cancer for 7 years now. The last 2 have been her hardest battle. It is a battle in which the cancer is winning, but she is a fighter. It makes a man sit back and wonder what being tough is all about.
Stephanie
I heard this song on the radio and went to the wonderful web to find the name of it and found your web site to go with it.I just wanted write and say what a sad but beautiful story.Your story is just (MORE)living testimony to show us what our Faith in Jesus Christ and The Power of LOVE Can Do!!!!!Praise God for your healing!!!! I will Keep Joni and your family in my prayers.God Bless You,Stephanie
Lana
I had heard this song on the radio and thought to myself that it is so much my family. I had always done most of the running of kids and errands in our family and then I was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2004. I can so relate to every verse in this song. While I never wore a wig I did hold my head up high and walked into church with my hat on. My husband and family has been so supportive. I think they realize all the daily things I did and appreciated it all. A friend I work with came in one morning and said she cried in the car driving to work because she heard this song for the first time and when she got to work she said that this song was written for me. I told her me and hundreds of other women.
I just want to tell all women to keep the faith. I truly believe in the power of prayer.
Lynell
I stumbled upon your website while looking for the words to this song. Believe it or not the first time I heard this song was while I was listening to the local country station while laying in the MRI machine — I have just been diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer. Thank you for this website —- it gives me hope!! Bless you, Lynell
Emily
I first heard the song in the car on my way to school. I am a 19 year old college student. I LOVE that song. That’s how I want to be one day. We younger girls look up to the “Joni’s” out there, so tell your wife, on behalf of the college girls looking for a husband to make happy, we love watching your faith and strength and we hope and pray it will be us one day.
Paul Schaffrin
I first heard the song yesterday morning in a restaurant for breakfast. The first verse reminded me of my wife (18 years and 8 kids together). It turned the waterworks on. Thank God she doesn’t have cancer. Then the 2nd verse reminded me of my mother who passed away with ovarian cancer 6 years ago at 66. She was tough, I am one of 11 kids. I did a yahoo search to find the song and found your story. It is beautiful. I will pray for you and your wife.
deedee
Thanks for sharing – I’ve worked with Relay for Life for 10 years and have met so many “Jonis” along the way. They are a true inspiration – and as tough as it is to be a caregiver – you receive such a blessing and appreciation for life!! God is GOOD!!