Sometimes this humble little blog effort touches me deep in my soul. It is an odd phenomenon that you can feel the pain of strangers by reading their words and feedback. I have been writing about a topic that God has been working on in my life for many years. Forgiveness. I still have a long way to go. But I have seen the debilitating effects on individuals, families, and churches when there is no forgiveness.
During my series on God’s Weight Loss Plan I received this heartbreaking message from a very honest reader who called herself “sinner”. Here is that post.
I doubt I will ever be able to forgive the pastor who hurt my family. We lost so much, so many opportunities were taken from my children, precious years are gone forever. I asked for help and got used instead and all these years later we are still dealing with the consequences of that pastor’s negligence and lies. Our own pastor made everything so confusing and difficult for so many years. My children, my children…they lost so much. I do not disagree with you or argue with anything you say. I am just trying now to help my children recover and I am doing it with no one helping me.
Here is the final line that really bothered me.
That pastor has all kinds of support but we have none.
How sad. But I know that is too often the case. I immediately thought of a song by Casting Crowns (I should be on their PR payroll). Here are some lyrics from the song Does Anybody Hear Her?
Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?
Or does anybody even knows she’s going down today
Under the shadow of our steeple
With all the lost and lonely people
Searching for the hope that’s tucked away in you and me
Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?
I was heartened when reader Sharon responded.
To “Sinner”
I don’t know anything about you, but I can tell you you have my support. Your response breaks my heart. I will pray for you and your family.
Sometimes the most simple expressions seem to help…
Sharon, Thank you for your prayers, especially for my children who have lost the most. I am hoping that in time I will not even think about it anymore.
I am grateful that Sharon, your humble blogger, and I am sure many others did hear you and we are praying that God will heal this wound. You are accountable only for you. Forgiving will release you from the burden. That pastor will face the consequences of any wrong actions even if it appears he is not facing them now. So trust God for the ability to forgive and know that it can happen. I look forward to the day that we can celebrate that victory.
Tiffany
i love this song
Mike Messerli
To "Sinner"…I am a pastor, and dear sister I do understand! Our senior pastor just fell into (rather ran) sin this year. We have let him go, but our church is reeling in the shadow of that sin. Sin is a horrible thing, it affects all it touches. We each need to trust the Lord with this…you see the head of the church, Christ himself, is still in charge. He’s still in charge of taking broken lives and fixing them. Take all of your wounds to him, and he will take care of you.
I’ll be praying for you, and although you may not trust pastors right now, there are a great number of us who love God and hate sin…don’t walk away from the church because of one man’s sins.
Mike
Kathy :-)
To "Sinner"…. I’m so sorry for the pain you have suffered. The wounds cut even deeper when inflicted by someone you once trusted and looked up to. I’m in your corner, but please understand that ministers are human and fallible (I know…. I am married to one!) Only our Savior and Lord Jesus Christ is beyond reproach. But please know you are not alone. You nor your family are invisible to God. He sees and empathizes with your brokenness. He is drawn with great compassion to broken people. For that purpose He gave His only Son. The good news is that you and your family can find healing through the abundant grace of Jesus Christ. May I recommend a helpful book? It is called "Total Forgiveness" by R. T. Kendall (Charisma House) and there is a companion study guide available. It can also be purchased in audiobook form. I have heard the author speak, and for the first time in my life I understood HOW to forgive others (yes, even ministers and their families can experience the pain of betrayal too). I also recommend a biblically-based fictional book called "Redeeming Love" by Francine Rivers. You and your family are in my prayers.
Sissy B.
I’m not sure why but part of your template is cut off so I could not read the whole post…plus i can only read 1/2 of this comment as I type. Just wanted to let you know. I look forward to re-reading this post.