One of the bummers about getting older is that you seem to go to a lot of funerals. It is always a sad time but I have to tell you that some funerals are a lot better than others. Of course for a Christian it is always a comfort to know that the departed had put their trust in Jesus as their Savior. But even that factor does not always make a funeral seem uplifting even in the sadness of loss. I was thinking about that yesterday as I drove home from still yet another memorial service. This service left me with a smile and feeling inspired even though I knew that many would miss this man tremendously. This particular service was for a man I did not know personally. I am a friend of one of his sons and family. So I went and listened to what others had to say about a man I did not know myself.
I knew from the obituary that he was a man of some accomplishment. I knew that he had done pretty well financially. But those things were hardly mentioned by friends and family. I reflected during my drive home on the themes that I heard from everyone about this man. That he was a man who fiercely and loyally loved his family and friends. A man who was giving. A man who was devoted to his wife and even in his last days referred to her as his “lover”. A man who loved life and lived it robustly. A man who loved to sing and shared his gift with others. A man who loved to give and spent his life giving. A man who was happy and made others happy that encountered him. A man who loved Jesus and meant it.
As I thought about what I had heard the riddle of why some funerals are better was answered for me. When you know a life is well lived you feel sadness but no regret that opportunities were lost. A life well lived shows the rest of us what matters. And clearly what matters is not just accomplishment or gain. A life well lived is invested in faith, family and friends. A life well lived values others and changes them. A life well lived serves others and affirms them.
One other thing I learned about going to a memorial service of a life well lived is that it is hard to get a parking place. People are able to clear their schedules for a person who made them feel valued, alive and special.
I hope I am investing in a life that will be evaluated as well-lived. Charlie Williams of Garland, Texas did not make news when he passed away this week. But he did make a difference with a life well lived. And I pray that I can follow his example.
E. Jones
My step-grandfather, Donnie, died tragically last year. He was a believer and truly kind man. He lived in a rural community in eastern WA. They held his memorial in the largest church in town (seats approx. 350 – 400.) It was so packed they had to turn folks away. They didn’t leave but were stayed in the parking lot. His two friends who delivered the eulogy said that what impressed them the most about Donnie was his generosity and kindness. They said in over 40 years they had never heard him speak ill of anyone. The whole experience was overwhelming and joyous. Made me think hard about legacy and living a life worthy of our Lord.
Lois
Thanks for this reminder. Lovely post.