I think forgiveness is the most challenging thing Jesus commands us to do. I sometimes ignore God’s Word about forgiveness and whether someone “deserves” mercy. Scripture can be so annoying! Paul threw down this difficult challenge to the Ephesian church.

Be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you. (Ephesians 4:32, NLT)

That is a very tall order and one that is impossible to do without remembering how much I have been forgiven. If you say something nasty about me and ask for forgiveness, I will probably grant it. If you do it again and ask forgiveness, I might forgive you again. If you do the same thing again and ask forgiveness, I will most likely respond with skepticism and ask you to “prove” you are sorry.

Yet that illustration is exactly what I do in my relationship with God every day. I have asked Him to forgive the same sin dozens, even hundreds of times. Still His Word tells me I am forgiven and He loves me just the same as the first time I confessed that sin. That is how God has forgiven me through Christ. I should respond accordingly to others, forgiving out of profound gratitude. Do you see any way around the obvious command to forgive? Me either.

 Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. (Colossians 3:13, NLT)

Bottom line: we are commanded to forgive as we have been forgiven. Forgiveness may well be the missing ingredient to the healing of most relationships. Forgive the one who wounded you. Forgive yourself and seek forgiveness if you are the one who wounded.

I imagine Jesus’ heart is saddened by my stubborn refusal to consider His forgiveness extended to me and, consequently, my refusal to lean on His power to forgive.

The reality is that there is fear on the road to forgiveness whenever I take my eyes off of Christ. My heart cries out in protest. What if they reject, scoff, or take advantage of my forgiveness? Jesus reminds me gently that He understands. And it is the right thing to do, no matter how the other party responds.

When I allow God to heal my heart and give me the power to forgive others the weight of the world is lifted off my soul. Sadly, too often, it is the road less taken. But it is the path that will make a difference in my (and your) journey with Jesus.

Author Will Davis Jr. explains that forgiveness is a process empowered by taking the step of faith.

“Once you decide to forgive, you initiate the healing process. Forgiveness gives your soul permission to move on to the higher and healthier ground of emotional recovery. Forgiveness is to your soul what antibiotics are to infection. It is the curative agent that will help to fully restore your soul. It doesn’t immediately remove the pain of the offense but it does start you on the road to recovery.”

I really like that perspective. The decision to forgive initiates but does not complete healing. You and I will, in time, heal. But we will never get there without taking the first step of faith.

I have spent a lot of unhappy moments not enjoying the freedom the Lord intended because I did not want to forgive someone who hurt me. I grieve to think of how I have stubbornly refused to forgive others for real and/or perceived slights over the years. I can imagine Jesus looking at me with sadness (not condemnation) because I have not fully comprehended the magnitude of the debt that has been erased from my account because of Him. If I cannot forgive, I have forgotten or never comprehended how much I have been forgiven.

How quickly I forget. I forget how much I have been forgiven. I forget how much I am loved by Jesus. I forget that I am a brand new creation. I forget I am righteous because of the finished  work of Christ. I forget that there is no condemnation in Christ. I forget that I am a beloved child of God and He is for me. I forget that He has my back and He has me in His hand forever. I am forgetful.

But thank God He does not forget His promises. I need to remember that today.