I am embracing my new found role of grumpy old man. I suspect others have viewed me as a grumpy old man for some time but I am just getting around to embracing it. I am on the record as a huge fan of the Muppets. Two very underrated characters were Statler and Waldorf, the two grumpy old guys who sat in the balcony and criticized the show every week. I loved those guys. Here is a sampling of the sarcastic stylings of Statler and Waldorf. Statler:  What would you do if you were a rich man?Waldorf:  I’d buy the network and cancel this show! Statler: Wake up you old fool. You slept through the show.Waldorf: Who’s a fool? You watched it. Statler: I wonder if there really is life on another planet?Waldorf: Why do you care? You don’t have a life on this one! Okay, I will concede that the Muppet faces and voices made the lines funnier. I am
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I am on record concerning my affection for coffee. Affection just sounds so much better than addiction. The truth is that when the Betty Ford Center opens the Java Wing I will be a candidate to cut the ribbon. So it is no surprise that I have frequented a Starbucks location or two over the years. A recent headline caught my eye concerning anti-God statements from the Seattle coffee giant. Let’s pick up the story from the Dayton Daily News. Michelle Incanno was an admitted Starbucks addict. She’d buy the company’s coffee beans every week. Whenever she’d get the chance to drop by a Starbucks, she would, placing the same order every time: a large, house brewed coffee with nonfat milk and two Splenda. That was until she got an unexpected jolt last week from her coffee cup. Printed on the cup was: “Why in moments of crisis do we ask God for strength and help? As cognitive beings, why would
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Christopher Hitchens is an erudite and witty writer. I am usually challenged by his insights and I suspect that his brain is much larger than mine. So it is with a bit of reticence that I address his new book, God is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything. Regular readers of these humble ramblings know that I totally disagree with Hitchen’s premise that God is not great. But I did tease in the title of this piece that Hitchen’s has a most unlikely supporter for his claim that religion poisons everything. That supporters name is Jesus. Jesus made more than a few enemies by pointing out that religion does poison the true message of God. Religion binds people in hopeless legalism. Religion controls with shock collars of fear and guilt. Jesus hated religion. Exhibit A comes from the Gospel of Matthew. Then Jesus said to the crowds and to his disciples, “The teachers of religious law and the Pharisees are the official interpreters of the law of Moses. So practice
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A local church is doing a sermon series involving what Jesus would say to various celebrities. The signboard asks the question, What would Jesus say to…. Alec Baldwin. Tom Cruise. Rosie O’Donnell. Bono. I wondered what I would say to each of those famous or infamous people. In my fantasy world I would say something like this… Alec Baldwin – Don’t misplace your anger. Tom Cruise – You might want to rethink the medication thing. Rosie O’Donnell – Remember when you were funny? Bono – You rock. In the real world I would likely not say any of those things except maybe the “you rock” to Bono. But I was wondering if what Jesus would say to a celebrity is the right question to ask? I am pretty good at figuring out what Jesus would say to others. I have an amazing ability to hear a sermon and wonder if Congregant A is hearing this? Or to shake my head and think,
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Several years ago there was an odd downturn in the culture that made mounted singing bass a must have item. The novelty item was known as “Billy Bass the Singing Fish”. Billy was motion activated and every time someone walked by you got to hear one of his very limited two song set. To be fair, that is pretty impressive for a fish. One of Billy’s greatest hits was a song made famous by singer Bobby McFerren. Billy Bass would flop and flap his gills while singing the lyrics to “Don’t Worry, Be Happy”. Little did I realize that Billy had stumbled onto an important truth. We should not worry because it only makes things worse. Here is a little song I wrote You might want to sing it note for note Don’t worry be happy In every life we have some trouble When you worry you make it double Don’t worry, be happy…… A story in the Health section of the Dallas Morning
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One of the recurring themes of these humble ramblings is that real, deep rooted growth comes through trials. Adversity introduces a man to himself and you find out if your faith, or lack of faith, will sustain you. I have been following the story of a young man going through a terrible and unjust trial. His name is Eric Volz. Eric is a US citizen who is being held in a Nicaraguan prison for a crime that he could not possibly have committed. In the interest of full disclosure, I do have a personal connection to this story. My son works at Belmont University and through him I have met Eric’s stepfather, Dane Anthony. Dane has left his job to devote himself fulltime to freeing his stepson. Dateline recently ran a story about the case. Here is a bit of background. A website called Friends of Eric Volz outlines the entire story. Here are just a few facts of the case. Doris Jimenez was
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When I was younger you knew exactly when a celebrities career had peaked and had begun to spiral slowly downward. That career reversal could be duly noted when a one time big star was booked on the Love Boat. So it is with some reluctance that I address the brouhaha surrounding the comments by talk show host Rosie O’Donnell. I am reluctant to discuss this because I think that Rosie is in the Love Boat phase of her career. To be fair, she has forged a career that garners her national attention. My career has made me a household name only in my household. Don’t expect her to waste her time on a feud with “the Dave” to parallel the ongoing nasty exchange with “the Donald”. To be honest, Rosie makes me sad when she isn’t making me angry. I hear the bitterness in her tone and the anger in her eyes and I feel sorry for her. I am sure that would
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