We won’t miss the “red devil” one bit…

This is also posted today at Joni’s site called Sharing the Journey. Joni and I met with the Oncologist yesterday to discuss our strategy for today and the weeks ahead. Our doctor decided to dial back the strength of the chemotherapy a bit to help prevent the kind of blood count problem we encountered last time. After today we have only one more encounter with the chemo drug the nurses call the “red devil”. I have met a new friend through this trial who is also sharing the cancer journey with his wife. His name is Rick Green. Rick is a pastor in Oregon and happens to be a talented artist. He did some sketches to help him deal with the emotional roller coaster of cancer. Here is his take on the “red devil” drug. I had written a post called “Poison for Healing” after the first round of chemo. I am going to repost that for those who are new arrivers to
Continue reading...

“Confessions of a Bad Christian” – Thanks a million…Not!

  One of my favorite quotes is from humorist/writer PJ O’Rourke who noted this sad truth.“Making fun of born-again Christians is like hunting dairy cows with a high powered rifle and scope.” It really can be that easy. Before I proceed I must issue a disclaimer. I am a born-again Christian. So it is with considerable interest and predictable angst that I note daily how Christians are portrayed in the news. Second disclaimer. I realize that media coverage of evangelical Christians is not always on a level playing field. It is quite okay to criticize Christians while tip-toeing around other faiths. But having disclaimed all of that I still get frustrated when we (Christians) shoot ourselves in the foot and blame the gun. A recent story from my adopted home state is a good example. A ministry in Denton has been distributing million-dollar bills with a gospel message printed on the back. Recently the Feds decided to “raid“ the headquarters to seize the
Continue reading...

“Confessions of a Bad Christian” – Round 3

I am going to post updates about Joni here for awhile as well as at her site. Here is the latest post from Sharing the Journey. Chemotherapy reminds me of the original Rocky movie. You take a beating, get back up, take a beating, get back up. Rocky had one goal in mind and that was to go the distance. As you got caught up in the drama you wondered how he could keep getting back on his feet and continuing. For Rocky there was no choice. Adrian: Why do you wanna fight? Rocky: Because I can’t sing or dance. As Rocky surmised, sometimes you don’t have many good options. In that movie Rocky fought the invincible Apollo Creed. No fighter had ever gone the distance against him. Joni is fighting a foe that is also intimidating but not invincible. Many of her sisters have fought and vanquished this foe. It is hard for me to watch her get back up and head
Continue reading...

“Confessions of a Bad Christian” – Unmasked

Dictionary.com defines masquerade as one who goes about as if in disguise; to have or put on a deceptive appearance. It is funny that Joni and I never realized we were putting on a bit of a masquerade as we adjusted to her breast cancer. We had no idea that we were donning masks at times. We had no intention of being deceptive. But we have both come to realize that we were sometimes putting on masks as we addressed the trial ahead. I was trying to be John Wayne and Joni was running around disquised as Wonder Woman. I dig John Wayne. But I am not John Wayne, Pilgrim. It is funny how you think that you have to always be strong and in control as a man. I first was “unmasked” by a friend at work. “How are you doing?“, my friend Mike asked. “Fine,“ I replied automatically. (Didn’t he know that John Wayne once said in The Man Who Shot Liberty
Continue reading...

“Confessions of a Bad Christian” – Bald is Beautiful…Part 2

There are abundant blessings to be found in every trial. One of the surprising blessings for me in our breast cancer journey has been meeting the sisterhood of breast cancer. That is when I first realized that bald is beautiful. These women are everywhere. And they are awesome. They are courageous. They have dignity and strength. One of my favorite t-shirts simply says… I am a REAL survivor! Not some weirdo who eats bugs and runs around scheming against one another to win big money. These survivors have looked death in the face and they have not blinked. Part of my early adapting to Joni losing her hair was watching these beautiful women come into the infusion suite at the cancer center. For those of you who have been blessed with never having to learn the terminology the infusion center is a room full of reclining chairs where you come for your chemo cocktail drip. Not exactly my idea of happy hour. But I came
Continue reading...

“Confessions of a Bad Christian” – Bald is Beautiful…Part 1

One of my smart aleck remarks that I use periodically is that “I am not burdened by that whole maturity thing.” There are many times when I go about demonstrating that in real life. But the unwelcome intrusion of “life” into my happy little routine has caused me to evaluate a lot of things. God is teaching and revealing a lot of things to me during our cancer journey. 1. I am clearly a work in progress as a follower of Jesus. 2. He has done a lot of work over the years that I was not aware of until this cancer trial came along. Last night I had the weird privilege of helping clip off the rest of my bride’s hair that was falling out from the chemotherapy. As I reflected on that moment later I realized that nearly everything I knew about beauty when I was 25 years old was wrong. Like most men I looked for appearance first and then tried to find some
Continue reading...